Rant: The guy at the coffee shop who called me out on my hobby

I was sitting at a local spot near downtown Austin last Saturday, telling my friend how I spend like 4 hours a week organizing my digital photos by date and tag. This older dude at the next table leaned over and asked if I actually looked at them after sorting. I said no, not really. He said I was just filing my life away, not living it. That hit me hard because he was right, I was more focused on organization than actually enjoying the moments. Has anyone else had a stranger point out something obvious about their habits?

3 comments

3 Comments

hayes.oliver21d ago

Did you ever stop to think about why you started organizing them in the first place? Like was it always about the photos or did it start with something else in your life that felt out of control? Because it sounds like maybe the organizing became a way to feel like you had a handle on things when you didn't. Sorting files doesn't ask anything of you, it just sits there and waits. That old guy kinda called out that you were doing busy work instead of the hard stuff. What would you really be doing with those 4 hours if you didn't spend them tagging photos?

nancy_miller21d ago

Isn't it wild how busy work can feel safer than actually dealing with your feelings?

bell.emma21d ago

My therapist had me set a timer for 15 minutes of feeling my feelings before I could do any busy work. It was awful at first but after a few weeks I actually started looking forward to that quiet time. Now when I catch myself organizing or cleaning I ask if I'm avoiding something and usually the answer is yes.